Vulgarians Meld Into Loonscape – December 12, 2011

Monday, December 12, 2011

• Wednesday, November 2 8:09 p.m. A man called to ask that an officer stand by as he collected a refund from a store manager who wasn’t enthused about giving back $25, even if, as the customer alleged, “all the [perishable] merchandise in the store is expired.” As an officer was en route to the store, the customer called back to cancel the call, saying that his two-year-old was getting fidgety and it wasn’t worth the fight for the money.

8:48 p.m. It took a week for a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship to evolve from sweetness and light to hysteria and police involvement. Called to a Valley West motel where they were staying so as to stand by as the man collected his possessions, an officer found that he had already done so and the woman had been banned from the premises.

11:22 p.m. The conflicted couple was reported arguing in a Valley West parking lot, but within minutes had migrated to another nearby motel to continue negotiations.

• Thursday, November 3 2:42 a.m. The same motel called about guests making a lot of noise in Room 133. They were evicted.

10:03 a.m. Police were called to a Valley West motel where an aggressive man in Room 122 had been acting violent and threatening the staff. He had to go, but the woman was allowed to stay.

1:41 p.m. A Hallen Drive resident was reported raving inside his apartment. He said he was arguing with the demons inside, asked to be voluntarily committed, and it was done.

2:04 p.m. Three computers were reported stolen from Arcata Elementary School.

7:16 p.m. A man sporting the classic backpack-and-beanie combo reportedly shoplifted at an I Street supermarket, then made his way down to Seventh Street, where he headed west. By the time he got to the parking lot behind an historic Plaza storehouse, he was in a fist fight with another guy. Police arrested both and found that one had a warrant out of Chico. Extradition issues were to be handled the next day.

8:08 p.m. A woman called 911 to report imaginary “bombs in the sky” over Giuntoli Lane, and became vulgar and argumentative on the phone. She was arrested on a drunkenness charge.

• Friday, November 4 6:36 a.m. Occupy Arcata activists were reportedly placing flyers in a newspaper rack outside City Hall, but police couldn’t confirm this.

10:18 a.m. A citizen complained that the occupiers had spread straw all over the front lawn and were now smoking cigarettes there, causing a fire hazard. The protesters told an officer that another police officer had told them the hay layer was “a good idea.”

10:54 a.m. A collarless brown pit bull roved alone on G Street, bleeding from the mouth and eyes. The unwell animal was last seen wandering toward Samoa Boulevard.

11:31 a.m. A 10th Street taco truck operator complained about people loitering and smoking pot in his parking lot, plus multiple other concerns.

9:04 p.m. A drunk danced in the street and bothered passersby with vulgarian antics outside a downtown donut shop, then melded into the general loonscape.

• Saturday, November 5 12:55 a.m. A woman’s ex-boyfriend reportedly entered a woman’s apartment through the window, then assaulted a man he found in her bedroom. The two-man brawl then migrated out to a parking lot, leaving the assault victim with a bloody lip and lacerated left knuckles. He didn’t want to prosecute.

1:08 a.m. A 12-pack was nicked from a Uniontown store, its new owner galumphing west on Sixth Street as fast as his larcenous feet could carry him.

3:32 a.m. A very public argument in a Uniontown parking lot resulted in a very public drunkenness arrest.

4:11 a.m. A man in a “box hat” with neon-green embroidery and matching shoelaces  called his girlfriend in Fortuna from the bars, asking for a ride home. She dutifully responded, but then lost contact with him and called police, worried that he was drunk, lost and not dressed for the weather. Police combed the town, found him at Samoa Boulevard and G Street and gave him a courtesy ride to the police station.

8:53 a.m. A 911 cell phone call sounded like a pocket-dial, with non-emergency noises heard in the background. Using GPS technology, police were able to determine the phone’s Stromberg Avenue location to within 14 meters. Though a subject has reportedly brandished a handgun and then tucked it into her waistband, the whole thing turned out to be a non-issue.

12:20 p.m. An Olympia Street resident got into an argument with the phone – not on the phone, but with the very telephone itself – and wrought stern vengeance on the offending device, breaking it.

5:16 p.m. Someone flew into a testy tizzy at the Occupy Arcata General Assembly and had to leave.

• Sunday, November 6  1:07 a.m. 

An apartment block out on Wisteria

Caused bongo-related hysteria

The thunderment factor

Was a great cop attractor

Soon dwindled the drummer deleria

1:55 a.m. The Carport of Adventure, Romance and Destiny (not always in that order) briefly hosted a gentleman wanted on a warrant.

11:30 a.m. An amorphous mass of travelers and dogs swarmed the front area of a Valley West dollar store, leaving its trash can dug through and the contents all over the sidewalk.

4:09 p.m. A man on H Street put on a disturbing display of mental unwellness, blurting unintelligibly, waving his arms, grabbing at his crotch and walking barefoot in a gutter flowing with rainwater, soaking his pants. Across the street, several young people seated in the donut shop’s front window munched pizza and watched the tragic spectacle with horrifying, amused-looking smiles, doing nothing to aid the reckless crazy person. Or maybe they knew something else was going on. Because just as a concerned passerby called police, a woman who he seemed to know came over to him and he immediately dropped the crazy act(?) and socially interacted with her just as any rational person might. When an officer arrived one minute and 20 seconds after the call, the man exhibited no signs of mental impairment, just severe but non-criminal dishevelment. In a stroke of luck, Kern County didn’t want him extradited for the warrant, just cited.

4:09 p.m. One block up, a man argued with himself, his guitar case or the alley (or some combination of the above) in which he mounted a solo hissysnit.

• Monday, November 7 12:15 a.m. A man on Ninth Street said his girlfriend had beaten him up. She said he had punched her in the leg and thrown her against a wall. He  was arrested for excessive boozery.

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