Mendacious Motel Messiah A Lousy Leprechaun Lookout – November 27, 2012

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

• Tuesday, October 16 7:45 a.m. A man came to the door of a lower H Street home asking for food, blankets and clothing, and was provided with the first two. This became a repeated pattern, making the resident nervous.

2:52 a.m. A car was again reported stolen from outside a J Street auto repair shop.

2:19 p.m. An unlocked Cannondale bike on L.K. Wood Boulevard made the stealin’ oh so easy.

2:31 p.m. Cars were entered two nights in a row on Jay Street, but nothing was taken, so the slithy toves responsible may have been doing investigative rummaging.

2:57 p.m. A woman complained of vulgar phone calls, texts and naughty images being sent to her phone.

9:16 p.m. A woman home alone heard her doorknob being turned, then spotted a short guy with a mustache in a checkered shirt lurking around outside.

• Wednesday, October 17, 2012 10:12 a.m. Feral cats are apparently colonizing Cedar Drive.

3:18 p.m. “If you want to know what I’m capable of doing, you will drop the claim,” said the son of a former employer against whom an ex-employee has brought a civil suit. The oddly worded threat seemed to threaten consequences for abandoning the legal action, but maybe the kid got it backward.

4:45 p.m. “I will track U down and make U wish U never met me. “I have your license plate number,” texted a woman who believed the recipient owed her money.

5:13 p.m. A Shirley Boulevard trim house stank up the ’hood.

• Thursday, October 18 8:40 a.m. Police were asked to check on a woman with two children walking barefoot on 14th Street, with one child wearing only a towel. They weren’t immediately found.

9:38 a.m. A woman at 14th and C streets was reported allowing two small children to drink water from the gutter. She was found and admonished, then offered relief services, but she was uncooperative.

12:28 p.m. A woman with long blonde hair and dirty clothes showed up at a Janes Road school with a boy and girl and asked about home schooling. The kids seemed “medicated,” and at one point the woman wandered across the street and urinated in a field. Before police could get there, the woman and kids left in a small white car.

7:25 p.m. A man described as stumbling and wobbly turned up at a Valley West car wash, where, resplendent in a blue baseball cap and matching sweater, he positioned himself outside a window and stared at the attendant. The bumbler was arrested on a public drunkenness charge.

8:05 p.m. A pregnant-looking woman about age 19 was reported panhandling with a gas can and a two-year-old child outside a Valley West store while a man gallantly waited in a car nearby for them to return with the loot. Police arrived within six minutes, but no one like that was found in the area.

• Friday, October 19 1:16 p.m. A man clad in tan linens from head to toe, with savioresque long brown hair and a beard, loitered in front of a Valley West motel office, rambling nonsensically about leprechauns. But the munchkin-monitoring messiah’s complaints about the allegedly elvin-embedded place being lousy with leprechauns seemed to be unfounded, as an employee there “sees no leprechauns or other small green people.”

3:46 p.m. A woman at a Valley West shipping facility took a call from someone who said she had criminal charges pending against her, and that she needed to fax her debit card number and personal information to “U.S. Fast Cash” so as to clear the charges.

• Saturday, October 20 10:37 a.m. A woman said that the previous night, a fat guy in a silver sedan followed her as she walked at Alliance and M streets, blocking her way with his car and beckoning her to get in. Appealing as that option may have been, she instead flagged down two passing bicyclists, and at that, the car zoomed off.

• Sunday, October 21 8:44 a.m. Multiple vehicles on lower Beverly Drive were entered and rummaged through.

10:30 a.m. A chatter of Chihuahuas, about 10 in number, clattered tinily about on Frederick Avenue. An investigating officer was approached by several neighbors complaining of the chronic Chihuahua crisis, which was traced to a faulty fence.

• Monday, October 22 12:15 p.m. A man came to the station complaing that someone was sending him text messages demanding that he sell the texter heroin or he would be beaten up.

1:28 p.m. A man’s messenger bag with checkbook was stolen from the HSU Library, and before he could cancel the account, two men cashed two checks at an Arcata Heights bank for $300 and $487.36. Security cameras there got clean shots of the men.

• Tuesday, October 23 11:37 a.m. A man in a red SUV approached a high school girl on M Street and asked her to get in. She didn’t.

3:35 p.m. A Courtyard Circle woman was walking to her patio area when a man on an upstairs balcony flicked a lit cigarette at her, which bounced off her arm. When she asked if he had thrown it at her, he laughed and said yes. Police found that the resident was mentally impaired, and couldn’t understand that what he had done was wrong. The caregiver said that his charge is afraid of the woman, who sometimes yells at them.

• Wednesday, October 24 6:49 a.m. A youth prone to self mutilation was hospitalized, then transferred to a mental health facility.

9:17 a.m. A man with a dirty hat and jacket wasn’t able to produce a photo ID at a Valley West store, but did have a wallet full of what looked like other people’s credit cards. He wandered away before police arrived.

10:19 a.m. A man and woman in a Valley West budget motel room were surprised by a visit from the man’s wife, and a massive argument ensued.

10:27 a.m. A blonde-haired woman ran around a Uniontown parking lot doing push-ups on shopping carts and “acting very strange.”

11:55 a.m. A man in an “unknown colored coat” screamed at the foot of a presidential Plaza statue. It turned out he was bellow-viating on a cell phone.

12:36 p.m. A mother said that her three-and-a-half year-old daughter showed her something that her grandmother had taught her in the bathtub, and it was described as “inappropriate touching.”

1:21 p.m. A 16th Street church has been phone-harassed for over a year by some flinky phone directory outfit demanding $599 for services the church never ordered.

2:18 p.m. An upper G Street resident said that the previous Friday, someone entered her home and wrote “REDRUM” on the bathroom mirror. She was concerned, because that spells “MURDER” backwards.

8:27 – 8:39 p.m. Someone called 911 from a Valley West motel asking for non-emergency service involving threats.

8:39 p.m. The man rephoned 911, again asking for non-emergency service.

8:39 p.m. The man called 911 again to declare that he would use 811 whenever he wants, whether it’s an emergency or not.

8:43 p.m. A 911 hang-up call was received from a Valley West motel.

• Thursday, October 25 12:29 a.m. A Valley West hotel lodger from Elk Grove had someone there call police, saying that he was some sort of “officer” and asking to speak with an APD officer about a bad dream. He appeared anxious, and would only give his cell number to police. He then called police to report seeing vessels, and would speak only to an officer about these vessels. When contacted, he said he had made a mistake in reporting the “incident.”

6:26 a.m. A damaged rental car was abandoned in a Valley West motel’s parking lot. The rental company had it towed.

8:42 a.m. A woman said that she wasn’t aware that her vehicle had been booted the previous night, and that she, a friend and a designated driver had somehow driven off in the hobbled car. Police reclaimed the boot from the trunk of her car, and issued her a 310 form for having a suspended driver’s license with service needed.