About a year ago, I attended a convention in Las Vegas. This involved getting up really early to set up the coffee booth. Not... »
Police Log
How Does “Use My Car Around Town” Come Through As “Sell My Car In San Diego?”
9:10 a.m. A long-haired man in a jean jacket and rubber boots was seen releasing domestic ducks into Klopp Lake, a violation. Another citizen on scene said the man had let the ducks out to get water – apparently some sort of necessity for ducks – then “boxed them up” and left. »
Arcata Police Log: Wronged, They Yearned To Confront Their Antagonists, But It Was Not To Be
11:45 a.m. Every day, a man shows up to “guard the front door” of a suspected Ariel Way grow house. »
911 Mistaken For Rapid-Response Cigarette-Lighting Service
4:42 p.m. Three snoopgaloots – those being slithy toves who forego cover of darkness and do their hunting for fungible items in cars during daytime – were reported rooting around in a Valley West motel parking lot. The caller opinied that the three were “no strangers to speed.” They wandered off before police arrived. »
The Joys Of Wandering In Traffic
12:21 p.m. A friendly old tabby cat was found with a blow dart lodged in its chest on Baldwin Street. It was taken to a veterinarian and is expected to recover. »
Arcata Police Log: Wandering Zomboid Goes Slo-Mo Vogueing In Mini-Mart Parking Spot
7:13 a.m. A woman explained to police that she was being stalked by spirits and Kevin Federline. »
Arcata Police Log: Tell You What, Keep The Porn But Don’t Come Back
12:45 p.m. A woman reported her landlords having entered her home without permission while she was away. Nothing was missing or disturbed, and there was no evidence of a crime, but the intrusive landlords “act” like they have been in her place. »
Arcata Police Log: Arcata Devolves Into A Race Of Hunter-Gatherer Slithy Tove Scavengers
6:48 a.m. A woman called 911 from the hospital. Asked if she had a life-or-death emergency, she said no, she just wanted to know what time it was. She was told to ask someone at the hospital. »
Minion-Beleagured Whingey McNuisance Unclear On The Concept Of 911 – December 30, 2012
12:44 p.m. A man in an orange sweatshirt was reported walking in circles at 14th and H streets. »
There Was Something Odd About That Bear-Eared, Spitting, Puppynapping Druggie – December 22, 2012
5:17 p.m. The one-wayness of the streets in the couplet at Foster, Eastern and Western avenues is not universally observed. One pedestrian reported that he always confronts cheaty-sneaky drivers on Foster Avenue who blaspheme traffic calming religion by not going The One True Way. »
Ridonkulousness, Duly Quoted – December 16, 2012
9:31 a.m. A man with a heavy Slavic accent called a Spring Street resident, telling her she had won a large sum of money. When questioned, Mr. Peggy hung up, throwing the phone call’s entire premise into doubt. »